There aren t answers in the back of this book of life ....

 I guess is impatience plus sadness.  And the headache does not help .... Maybe I had a bad day ... Maybe I feel I fight the wind , and its not beneath my wings .... At some point I got so upset ... I felt drained, I just kept it inside, went gym and tried to sweat it out .... I thought I did , I forgot about everything for a couple of hours than here I am , loosing it ....
Sometimes I grow tired of being fine   Looking for the answers to questions I don t want to ask ... Sometimes I feel I wanna go away far far and not look back   Of course I could never do that, I m not so egoist.. .... But it would be nice    When nobody can t help you , what are you supposed to do ?! How do you fight your own demons, how do you carry on ?  Is it raining ? Cause I feel like leaving it rain ...
I guess its the feeling of not being good enough ... Whatever I do, it doesn t feel enough .... I always pick myself up thou .... In this very moment I actually don t know how I do it ... But I do, every time and I ll do it this time too .  I ll cheer up with my book, extraordinary story around the Irish famine ... Those people had it raugh, no time for stupid headaches and moodswings .  They were not lifeless with a heartbeat , I m not either ! So I ll just shout in silence for a while and let myself  dance with closed eyes